FRIDAY LIVING.

although bad week is over, and bad week is going to continue for awhile.. i am taking a load off this weekend. every time i look at my dog, i start crying. i spent today playing with his ears. they're so soft. putting a dog down is never easy, and neither is saying goodbye to a family member.. but this is where i am right now. this is my life. this is how things are. suck it up botch, deal with it.
i've battled a tough week, and it wasn't easy, and i am ready to take a break from it all. putting things aside momentarily doesn't make me a bad person, and i believe that. moving forward from things works for me, and i plan on sticking to that.
i didn't have fun this week, it was pure mentality build, so no picture post today. i spent the week maintaining myself, balancing my moods, crying into pillows, and having phone conversations with my mom. that's completely fine by me. i find peace in knowing that what's happening to me now might hurt like fuck, but it's also happening for a reason. two souls who mean the world to me are preparing themselves to leave the world.. and although death isn't new to me, having a chance to say goodbye is.. and if i'm thankful for anything, i'm thankful for that.

i will have a good weekend. i will spend it with my grandpa, my friends, and my dog, edy. i deserve it now more than ever, and i am looking forward to it. tears might flow, but so will the music, so will the conversations, so will the cuddling, and so will the beer.. i will not complain, so instead.. i will live.

"lets end this absolute shit week by forgetting it. with booze." - aggie sems.