THE FAVOR MONSTER.

I have this huge issue with people who ask for handouts all the time. Especially when they get pissy when you say "no" one time. Friendship is so easy. It's fun, it's timeless, it's hilarious, and if it isn't, then it's time to re-evaluate. If you get upset when someone doesn't say "yes" to your favor, look at yourself. Do you ask people to do things all the time?! Do you need help moving? Do you need to borrow a few bucks?! Are you cleaning out your garage?! Do you need a ride?! Installing a new entertainment unit?! BUT CAN'T FIND HELP ANYWHERE?! WELL CONGRATULATIONS! You just won the title of the "FAVOR MONSTER"! Your prize includes an all-inclusive stay at being an asshole and having no friends forever!

Seriously. If you find yourself in a hole, you shouldn't have to beg for it. Shit, you should even have people offering you a helping hand without you asking! If you don't, it's because you're a prick.

How about a slice of pizza or a "thank you" for fucking once?! Gawd.
I give my help to those that deserve it and are there for me, you can move on with your favors, I am not answering.

5 FACEBOOK PET PEEVES.

Well. You've done it. You've logged into Facebook. What were you thinking?! Get out of there. Now you're going to be overwhelmed with inspirational quotes and memes that are nowhere near funny. Oh, Facebook. Dear, Facebook. Where you get invited to things you don't care about and block applications like they're software updates.
Facebook. The number one website in the world that helps you to "stay connected". It does a good job of that. I won't deny it. However, the swamp effect is a little un-bearable. The swamp effect. That's what I call it. Here's a list of 5 Facebook pet peeves that drive me crazy.

1. THE STATUS UPDATER
"What a nice day outside!", "Going for a walk.", "Omg so tired!", "Having dinner, then going to bed". OH, WOW. Thank you. My day certainly was not going good until THIS happened! Thank you so much!

2. THE GYM RAT
These ones. These ones. Check in at the gym. Updated status: "Make time, no excuses". Mobile photo of their protein shake. Gym quote. HOLY, FUCKING, SHIT. We get it. I completely encourage people to better themselves but if you're needing all types of attention from it, it's annoying, and we end up deleting you. Then you'll be getting a lot less "likes", bro.

3. KIDS/ANIMALS
Oh, that's your kid eating, cute:) Oh you're kid sleeping, cute:) Okay, your kid in a new shirt. Okay, kid watching tv. Kid sitting. Kid standing. Omg, you've posted 46 pictures of your kid in one day. Not much has changed. Replace "kid" with any "pet", this can go both ways.

4. EVERY SINGLE INTERNET MEME/INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE EVER
If you're showing me 10 memes per day, chances are, they aren't all funny. Don't TRY to succeed, man. "Oh this is kind of cool". NO! Kind of cool, you glance over. Share the things that FLOOR you. THAT ARE AN ABSOLUTE MUST. The inspirational quote doesn't help you none either.

5. ATTENTION CRIES:(
These statuses: "Don't even want to talk about it :(", "This is the fucking worst :(". OH THESE CLIFFHANGERS! The statuses that are just begging for someone to comment "What's wrong, hun?!". UGH. I wish all these emo fucking fucks would get blogs.

IN SUMMARY: Facebook should be: WHAT YOU WOULD TALK ABOUT WITH YOUR FRIENDS/FAMILY. It is conversation, it is your life. If you would bring all of these things up, then fine, go ahead. Your friends/family are probably used to your annoying self already.. but if you would not, refrain. Hold back a little. Our timelines are hard to catch up on with the swamp effect. Chill yo, chill.

What's your biggest Facebook pet peeve?!

WHAT'S WACK ON A WEDNESDAY!

Given that I haven't done a "What's Wack Wednesday" in a hot minute now. I thought I'd take this moment to also dish out a 25. Hey. If I was queen of the universe (which some days I feel I am), I would rid the world of a shit load.. but instead of listing a million, I'll take the time to throw down 25. & you could have it all folks! All if you get lost between god and a shot of scotch!

WHAT'S WACK WEDNESDAY

THE I DON'T NEED YOU EDITION

1. CARDBOARD APPLICATOR TAMPONS
TORTURE DEVICES! Au revoir! Don't need ya!

2. VOICEMAIL
I don't know why I have voicemail. I'm paying for this when the only person who leaves me voicemails is my mom. & they ALL sound like this "Je, darling, baby, it's mom. Ok. It's mommy. Where are you?". SHE'S LITERALLY, the only person who leaves me voicemails and they're always the same. For one, I see her on my call display so I know she called without the voicemail.. BUT, for some reason, I save all of them, cause I love her so much! Would I trip if I gave up the voicemail deal?! Prolly not, I have a million of the same thing to last a lifetime.

3. SLUSH
Dirty, salty, winter slush. Peace.

4. 1 PLY TOILET PAPER
To all the public bathrooms that supply 1 ply.. I'm pretty sure they all do this because it's cheaper.. but if we really look at this situation with thought.. I feel comfortable in saying anyone who uses 1-ply, takes a little more.. wouldn't that even out costs?! We take more than we would when using 2 ply. Get rid of it.

5. NICKI MINAJ
We don't need her. hahahahah.

6. BILLS
I don't want you anymore either.

7. "YOU'VE JUST WON A CRUISE"
Stop calling me.

8. HYPOCRITICAL PROTESTERS
The ones that are against violence yet throw bricks through windows. YO, hippie, do you even know what you're "fighting" for right now?

9. PLANE RUSHERS
Every single person who gets up right when the plane lands. I'm sorry, but you're actually making things run slower. Fifty people heading for the same overhead compartment at the exact same time will not help you get to luggage faster. Your rushing ass is only making yourself later than you would be if you just let people do this in an orderly fashion. Teacher sounding enough, I hate it.

10. CHEAP BATTERIES
That go in your camera and let you take one picture. These need to get off the market, I've done the best I can by not buying them anymore.. but other people don't need the one picture demise.

11. HANGOVERS
Partying would be so much funner without the hangovers.

12. HOLD
If I could rid the world of being on hold! 60 million hours are wasted on hold per year.. I googled it. That's disgusting. & hold music is rarely ever good, so rid the world of that too. If we're going to be put on hold, they should play nas. hahaha.

13. JUNK MAIL
Both snail, and email. Get out get out get out!

14. CD PACKAGING
HOW HAS SOMEONE NOT FIXED THIS YET?!! That little tab was not that big of a move people! It shouldn't even be classified as a tab! BOOO.

15. WHEN THINGS GET STUCK IN VENDING MACHINES
This would never happen in my utopia.

16. WEATHER PEOPLE
You're all liars.

17. CHEAP UMBRELLAS
.. that embarrass me to shit when they turn inside out downtown infront of a gazillion people.

18. LOVE HANDLES
Well, maybe I wouldn't rid the entire world of love handles.. just mine. This way the people I dislike are still on the fat wagon. See what I did there. Nice.

19. HASHTAG RAP
It's sooooo doooone already. Get rid of it. Along with auto-tune. Off with their heads! Won't miss you. Bye.

20. SCRATCHED CDS
I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE the feeling of opening a new cd. I LOOOOVE reading the booklets, the artists' thank yous, and bios, and lyrics. I fully enjoy knowing that I am supporting what I love, and that I have a hard copy of not only their album art, but their passion. THIS IS WHY I DON'T HAVE AN IPOD. I hate when the shit gets scratched and I stress out on whether I should buy a new one or not though. Don't, need, that. Buying a new one isn't the same as the original. The excitement is gone, and so is that "oh yeah this was so worth it!" feeling. Wamp.

21. MOSQUITOES AND WASPS
and any bug actually cuz I hate bugs. Circle of life?! Ehhhh. I'm sure nature could work something out. Maybe they only come out at like 5am-6am, so we have that hour to know that all bugs are outside and we must avoid them. & they never go in buildings or cars. Have you ever been trapped in a car with a wasp and a raspberry passiontea lemonade?! THE WORST.

22. ITCHES ON THE BACK THAT YOU CAN'T REACH
That's it.

23. SWEATY PALMS
My palms don't get sweaty, but I've dated people who have, had.. this, situation? Holding hands was not my favorite.. and niether is saying what's up to someone when you're about to shake hands with a lake. Now I gotta wipe my hands on my pants and have someone else's sweat on my jeans. Whoo hoo. Hooray.

24. LIGHT BULB BURN OUTS
I don't thing I've ever not gone "AHHH HOLY MOTHER FUCKING COCK BITCH SLUT!" when the flash occurs. It always scares the fuck outta me. & changing light bulbs is never a good time.. I mean sure, the after part is, when everything's brighter and tra la la! But actually changing bulbs, not so much.

25. PEOPLE WHO CUT IN LINES
Get off my earth.

MOTHER. FUCKER.

so i've been having a good past few days. i won $100 on a scratch ticket, so i was like fuck yeah. put that shit on my over-maxed credit card.. so i planned to put money on my credit card to actually get it in a range where it's not over-maxed haha. WHOO. it was exciting. so i did that. threw some money on my credit card.. and now that my credit is in a safe place.. i wanted to book a hotel for new york. did i mention i'm going to new york yet?! yes. greyhounding it from toronto (brutal! but 25 minutes in buffalo if anyone wants to say hi?). hollur. anyways, so i'm online booking this shit, when i go to type in my expiration date.. MY CARD IS EXPIRED!! WHAT?! so i freak the fuck out basically. cuz i need to book this shit within three days. how can they not notice?! i mean i've been paying my expired credit card for six months.. so wtfuX?! i guess i'm dumb for not even noticing it's expired, but STILL.
so i call up my bank, and i'm like, "yo bank, where the fuck's my new card".. and they're all "yo botch, we sent it to you", and i'm all "yo bank, if i had that shit, i'd be using it." and the banks all "yo botch, the status is that it sent". SOOOOOOO FUCK ME. my new credit card was lost in the mail, or someone stole it. puttin my money on the steal-age.
so basically, they cancelled the sent one, and are giving me a new one, that i'll pick up so that it won't be so "lost" or "stolen" this time.. AND THEY SAY, it'll take 7 business days. so i'm like, "yo bank, i need it in three days." and the banks all "yo botch, express courier?".. and i'm all "yo bank, get it to me within three days. that's it. make it happen"
so it better get here in three days, otherwise there will be a crazy woman in the bank yelling to give her a credit card.
that is all.

WHEN I FIRST STEPPED ON THE SCENE, BLOGGERS WAS PETFRIFIED..

JUMP BACK ON THEY TUMBLR LIKE THEY WERE BEING CHASED BY HOMICIDE.
MORE THAN PICTURES, THE GIRL CAN WRITE, & IT WILL NEVER STEER YOU WRONG.
& ALL YOU PUNK ASS BITCHES WITH A BLOG WON'T BE LASTING LONG ( ! )

so last night bonibelle and i had the craziest phone conversation about girls who suck.. pretty much all girls suck actually. i mean.. i get along with like zero. now some of you might say "but you have friends that are girls".. okay, shit.. you got me. i have very few though. & a lot of girls that say hi to me, don't like me. the thing about girls is, they say hi to people they don't like because it's easier. it's easier to just leave the person with the life that they have than putting all your time and energy into being mean to them.. or they're just too scared to actually hate.. cause we merk bitches..
in essence, there are a billion things that come to mind when i think of girls.. and shit.. they be waaaaccckkkk!!

WHAT'S WACK WEDNESDAY

THE BITCH EDITION

"seriously though, she looks like franklin."
"hahahah, yeah she has no neck, she's not fat though, but kind of round.. like a beetle."
"hahahhaahahahha"
"seriously dude, like just a head and a body.. OH.. MY.. GOD.. she's a penguin."

yeah that's the kind of shit we say about people. it's not very nice.. lol.. but shit, girls are fucking mean man. i've never been rude to anyone that didn't deserve it.. for instance.

GIRL(S) NUMERO UNO!
GIRLS WHO TAKE WORDS FROM ME. i take pride in who i am, and i flaunt it. i am me for me, and i have been this way for a very long time. whether it's music, writing, sneakers, or whatever the fuck else i dig, i represent it. it urks me to see things that i wrote on someone else's shit. IT HURTS EVEN MORE WHEN SOMEONE COMPLIMENTS THEM ON SOMETHING THEY STOLE FROM ME. fuck you, trifilin bitches!

GIRLS WHO CLAIM EVERYTHING
hey i digs my hip hop. i dig blogging. i dig writing. i dig zombies. whatevaaahhh i like, i like. i think it's absolutely absurd when someone likes something just to like something. like.. liking something because it's dope to other people. if i met a person who was into dinosaurs, i'd be like "fuck, really?! like.. dinosaurs?! fucking cool man." cuz yo, that's THAT person, not someone else. so when you front on me, pretending like "yeah i love this atmosphere song, i'm so totally obsessed with atmosphere, he's hot". well honey, atmosphere is not one person, so you fail. stop trying to steal things and hobbies off people to try and sleep with a boy. because we all know that you can't be really good at rollerblading, ballet, mma, video games, hip hop, rock, collecting, painting, cooking, swimming.. please no stop. i don't believe you have all those hobbies, you're posing.

INSECURE GIRLS
who hate on whoever hangs out with their boyfriend and call every five seconds. uhm.. ew. can you be anymore stalker?! anyone who goes through extreme measures (LIKE LISTENING IN ON THEIR BOYFRIENDS PHONE CONVERSATIONS) should just consider that relationship a bomb. it's done. over. glitzzzeddd. you're outta here. & sorry, you're fat. go cry now.

HOES
i'm aware that the "hoes" i am talking about is supposed to be spelled as "ho", but i refuse to forever, so it's hoes. it's hard for me to use the word because it's become a word with no definition. "any where, any time, any hole". lol mother fucking ew. i think hoes can pretty much be grouped into different categories..
you got like, the innocent hoe.. these are the hoes that pretend they're good, but they end up hitting on everything with a dick behind close doors.. trust me, they're not innocent. i find that innocent hoes are usually down to go to every bar in the world, but they don't drink. they'll have like one drink, sip it slow, to make it look like they're drinking a lot.. and then when they see a dude that's drunk, she'll swerve over there. after that it doesn't take much, dude sees the innocent hoe, and immediately lays his game down.. thinking "i want what i can't have".. meanwhile this is just an evil ploy that the innocent hoe has laid down to get dude. it's very scientific.
then you got the straight up nasty hoes, who just fuck anything with a dick. gross. they're usually ones who will make out with anyone, girl or guy, at parties to try and up their "sexy" status. they also slip in little "accidental" thigh touches or arm brushes on dudes to get their testosterone up.. oh, and they usually hang out in groups of girls. this way, they look hotter than they would if they were solo.
the "oops" hoe. this type of hoe is referring to the hoes who have had 500 boyfriends.. but they weren't really boyfriends. anyone who hits on this hoe can have her.. she then sleeps with them and tells herself that this person is her boyfriend. this way, she won't feel bad the next morning when he doesn't call. "yeah i know him, we dated". uhhh, no honey, you fucked.
then there's the stupid hoe, the hoe that gets played by a dude because she thinks he loves herrrrr.. and she gives him everything he wants. brains on the daily. the stupid hoe will fall into the trap, and once she's there, she's stuck. dude could have his arms fully around another broad, and stupid hoe would tell herself "they're just friends".. til she turns around and the other broad and dude are making out. then what?! sorry.. but it will happen (if it hasn't already, boom, roasted.)..
& of course we can't forget, hoes who fuck for money, or reputation or status.. fuckin' hoes.

THE BORING GIRLS
the girls who dress like a jacob mannequin, don't say anything to you and basically just try to use you so that you'll say good things about them. no. i refuse to say good things about you. what have you ever done for me?! nothing.

IN SUMMARY, if you don't talk to me, do not expect me to talk to you. if you're a hoe, expect me to treat you like one. if you lie, i will confront you. if i tell you something and you don't listen, i will speak louder.

have a good day people.

p.s.


on things that aren't wack..

my brother made this. he's fucking dope.. and you should buy his shit. check him out, HERE

MOTHER FUCKER IT'S WEDNESDAY.

.. and i know of some things that be wack and shit.

HEY! i came up with a lot of things for today this week AND i remembered to write them all down. so enough with the yakkedy yack, here's what's wack.

BOTCHED BOOB JOBS
i love when girls get boob jobs, then in their outfits they have no cleavage.. cause like either their boobs are too far apart, or they're super high at like their shoulders. i don't mind boob jobs, as long as you're doing it for yourself.. but when you're doing it so you can be a hoe, mother fucker you deserve that shit.

JENNY HUMPHREY
she's still a fucking hoe. FUCK OFF JENNY! WILL YOU JUST LEAVE THE CITY ALREADY?! what is your fucking deal! honestly! you don't know shit! you're just a horny slut without any friends. i hate you!!

BOYFRIEND GREEDS
girls who think i want their boyfriend. PLEASE. stop. i do not want your shit. so please stop eye'ing me like you're going to beat me down with your eyeballs. I HAVE A BOYFRIEND. & i am absolutely fully 500% committed to him right now. I FUCKING HATE GIRLS@!!! LEAVE ME ALONE.

LO, STEPHANIE, AUDRINA
stop talking shit about kristin. talk to her if you wanna say something. she's too ill na na for you guys. i used to love all three of you, but if you're not being straight up with kristin, you deserve to be cussed off. YUP.

NO HEARING.
WHY DO I NOT HAVE THE BEATS BY DRE HEADPHONES YET?! that's wack.

NOT AGREEING TO DIS-AGREE
i understand everyone has an opinion. everyone sees something a certain way, and that's their shit. i enjoy myself a good debate every now and then.. but when it comes to a certain point, it is time to realize that you are not going to change what the other person thinks. it's time to let that shit go and realize that hey.. what you think is what you think, what the other person thinks is what the other person thinks. LET IT GO. arguments that last for a month are childish. we're grown people. we're grown./

CHANGE AT CHECK OUT
when you're in line anywhere, and the person ahead of you whips out this change purse.. with a billion other things in it, to count out their amount in change so they can receive an equal amount. i especially hate this when their total is like 9.98. they're like whipping out these cards, and garbage from their coin purse to find enough coins to equal 98 cents.. LIKE REALLY PEOPLE!? you do realize you're going to get two pennies back, is that really worth keeping me from getting to the front of the line!? if you have change fine, but at least have that shit out instead of digging for it for five hours. "okay.. and that's 98 cents! .. and i think i have a coupon here somewhere.." FUCK ME.

PLANE DE-BOARDING
i travel quite a bit compared to the regular person, so i've had my share of plane rides.. and i HAAAAAAAAAAATTTEEE when you land, and everybody gets up like there's a fire. THE CAPTAIN CLEARLY SAYS STAY SEATED TIL THE PLANE IS STOPPED.. and all this rushing just makes shit go even slower..!! like hello, these aisles are big enough for a single file line, you're not going to pass anybody, so just fucking wait your fucking turn.. OH!! and then, these rushing assholes get off the plane, and they stand infront of the fucking doorway to wait for their friend, or family. REALLY?! can you not wait at baggage claim, or at least move to the side?! you nearly trampled me, and my carry on, to block my way some more.

NO $$$$
isn't it annoying when you have all this cash, and you go shopping and buy nothing.. then when you have no cash, you see something you've wanted for a long time, and it's the last one.. and when you get cash to go get it, it isn't there anymore. this always happens to me. i always find something i want when i don't have money. yeah. that's wack.


WHAT BUGS YOU ?!

YOU KNOW WHAT DAY IT IS..

WHAT'S WACK WEDNESDAY !!

SKULLS
i can NOT stress enough, how much i hate skulls.. on clothing mostly.. on rings it doesn't bother me so much.. but ugh. they usually aren't cool looking skulls, they're homo looking ones. fucking lame. i have a pretty sweet skull ring though, that's prolly my only exception.

TALL PEOPLE AT HIP HOP SHOWS
:( you make me look 4'11 !! it's so hard for me to see, i'm little:(.. im 5'6 btw!

MIS-PRONOUNCIATION
listening to the radio, three seperate people pronounced "shaolin" as "shay-oh-lynn", pharoahe monche as "pharoahe monk", and "rza" as "are-zee-A".. if you don't know, cool. fine. whatevs.. no big deal! it just hurts to hear people who say they know something, wrong. i'm a firm believer in only saying things that i believe are fact.. if i don't know something, i'll admit to it. i don't know shit about a lot of shit, but for the shit that i know shit about, you can expect to hear shit about it! shit.

STUPID HOES
there were four people at tables. one table had two girls. one table had a couple. i asked generally, "excuse me, would any of you happen to have a lighter".. broad at the couple table looked at me with this ".. really?" type look. look bitch, i am not trying to hook up with your geek faced looking boyfriend, i just want a fucking smoke alright.

"YO I'LL BE THERE IN FIFTEEN"
don't say this to me unless you really mean fifteen minutes! 1 hour later isn't fifteen! at least gimmie a courtesy call.. im rushin to get ready realizing you should've been there ten minutes ago..and people wonder why i'm always late to everything.. cuz i figure fifteen minutes means an hour these days! lol.

MONEY SHOVERS
that denim louis vuitton bag, black ed hardy cardigan, zebra printed dress, leopard printed shoes aren't doing it for you old lady. i get it, you're expensive. i can understand people want to floss, i've never really been like that. i dress in what i think is comfortable.. i get excited about designer tags, but i'm not about to ever dump my life savings into something just so people think my life is proper. i'd rather have a high savings account than look like a walking douche bag with designer throw up on my body.

PEOPLE WHO TRASH TALK WINNIPEG
i have never lived on a farm. i was actually born in a city. we have cars, just like other cities.. and buses. i don't live in an igloo. nor do my neighbours. i don't know everyone from winnipeg, and i've never walked into a local grocery store with a greeting from the cashier. i don't go to a diner to eat, i don't have a regular meal. i've met/seen different people, every day. i am from an AMAZING city, which i hold dear to my heart, so if i ever hear "fuck there's nothing to do in winnipeg".. you can just spit that shit to someone else. winnipeg and toronto are my home, for now, and forever.

LITTLE GIRLS WHO WEAR MAKE UP
:( i do not likey.

HOW IS EVERYTHING?
when a waiter/waitress comes up to you as your mouth is stuffed with food.. and ask, how is everything.. "fuiaghkjgasdasd asjdkhas fjhjdaaa?" yeah i didn't think you would understand. just keep your eyes on my water, when the glass is empty, come on over.

LANGUAGE TATTOOS
when people get tattoos in a language that isn't a part of their culture.. okay, so you're filipino, but you're getting a tattoo in italian?! don't getttt ittt.. i guess i'm kind of an asshole who believes in tattoos that mean something. i think they're art. & i think that the whole language thing is just douche bags trying to be cool.. like in mean girls, when they're confessing and he says "SHE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE!" "do you even go to this school?!" YEAH~!!! THATS WHAT YOU'RE DOING, but with tattoos!

anyways, my ass fucking hurts. payce.

WEDNESDAY.

WHAT'S WACK AND SHIT!!!

NOT HAVING TIME TO DO ANYTHING
i wanna go to schoooooooool, i wanna make moneeeyyy.. i wannt hang out with my boyyyyfriendd.. i wanna parrrttyyy!! stop being selfish time!!

NICK MINAJ, RIHANNA, KESHA
for being the biggest twats on the planet!! plus, they're doing a show together. the fuck is that shit!! when i told my boyfriend he was like "who the fuck shit that idea out?!" i could not stop laughing. rihanna is so trashy. she tries to be this ill na na type deal but she's just stealing a little bit from everybody who is on top. kesha is just an uffie wannabe. i CANNOT WAIT til uffie drops her album to show her who's boss. nicki minaj.. uggghhhh.. she is just boobs and a butt saying shit no one listens to.. because if people did actually listen to it, no one would care.

THIS:

hip hop royalty?! are you fucking kidding me right now?!

ALLERGIES
i have hives all over. i refuse to hang out with anyone. go away!! im itchy:(

BUBBLE TEA PEOPLE
okay new spot! decided to try it outtt with my cousin.. it's the one by winners, i forget what it's called.. but the girl made a bubble tea for a staff member before US!! it was two dudes, one girl. so the girl made a bubble tea for the guy.. then those two guys was juzz chillin.. one was watching tv.. WHAT ARE YOU DOING! it's not like there's nothing to be done, you could help the girl. then while we're waiting, the girl runs to the front to help other customers, and dude watches tv for a bit, and then he serves us.. damn bubble tea, why do you have to be so good!!

WEDNESDAYS
so close yet sooo farrrrrrrr..!!!

JENNY HUMPHREY
you stupid hoe!! stop trying to steal nate!! leave nate and serena alone!! wtf is your deal you lame-o?! WILL YOU GET YOUR OWN LIFE ALREADY?! gawd you're annoying. you need to get with chuck's mom, move to some far away island and never come back to the gg world ever again!!

WIND
stop blowing sand into my sneakers and face! thanks.

my day officially just ended.. and i'm tired and itchy!! i am sooo not looking forward to tomorrow. well the beginning at least.. i'm cuttin my hair tomorrow so goodbye rapunzel! helloooooo easy street. minus the working part. fuckfuckfuck. i need another job asap. help!! til tomorrow suckahs.

HAPPY HUMP DAY.

some days i really love wednesdays.. you get that fuck yeah it's almost the weekend.. some times the day goes fucking shitty as fuck. time is slow and your eyes wanna shut down.. today was fucking beautiful. the weather was bomb.. and i went to the mall. i'm not a mall person, i hate the mall and everybody in it.. you'll probably see me in a mall at a maximum of like 4 times a year.. and that's a generous four.. i didn't hate today though.. i had a good day with my cousin and came home happy and ready to lay down in my bed.. but even with that, i still gotta say what's wack..

WHAT'S WACK WEDNESDAY

CIGARETTE TAX TELL ME HOW A PACK OF BELMONTS COST ME $14. wtf is that shit!? i was aware that cigarette tax was going up 50 cents.. but i didn't realize it would hurt me that bad til i actually had to buy a pack. i is getting robbed. cigarettes in the states are like $3. we need to get on that shit. damn this free health care. damn ittttt..

SPRING NO BREAK spring break without the break cause you just end up working more. getting a bigger paycheque will be so dope.. but yooo.. OH WAIT! FRIDAY IS GOOD FRIDAY!! so tomorrow is actually my friday.. so technically speaking.. it's thursday! shit son.. maybe this isn't so bad afterall.. OH WAIT! i found a way to complain about it.. friday is a holiday, and it's a part of spring break?! that's cheating.

BREAK-UP SEASON i swear to life, late march, early april.. totally break up season. this isn't really wack, but what is wack is hurting people. i don't know what the fuck is up with spring, but it makes people fucking crazy. people tend to do such fucked up shit, and THAT is wack. spring is fucking shit for making people psychotic bitch azz cunt fucked dyke lookin pricked assholes.. i some how need to find a way to turn spring into capsules.. and then sell it. i will be the richest drug lord to ever have lived!!

WU-TANG YES. wu tang on what's wack wednesdays..! for being sold out everywhere i go! WHAT THE FUCK! i want the massacre. WINNIPEG DOESNT EVEN LIKE HIP HOP ONLY I DO! stop trying to steal it winnipeg! you fuckers! ..okay sigh. i'm glad the album is being purchased, they deserves the penny.. BUT FUCK! can you guys wait to buy your copy til i get mine!? cool thaaanks.

SLOW FUCKS BECAUSE THEY'RE DUMB today i went to get bubble tea in the boonies. it was the boonies, so there was literally no one in the fucking place.. and girl took for-fucking-ever to make my shit. LOOK LITTLE GIRL, there is no time to be fucking dilly dally'ing.. i fucking want my shit! i have things to not do, and people to not see, so make me my drank and be on with your life..!! when i walked in stupid hoe was fucking reading a magazine while a table was covered with cups and napkins. get off your ass you dumb bitch! don't worry people, i left my blog open in their little "cyber area" so hopefully she'll read this.. i could've written a fuckin entry waiting that long. hahah.. she totally said "thanks for coming" so nicely when i was leaving too.. LOL im such an asshole. 5YN-tifik.blogspot.com you stupid mothah suckah!!

HAIR CONDITIONER i'm not sure if i'm the only person who has this problem, but i ALWAYS, ALWAYS, run out of conditioner before shampoo.. shit fucking baffles me! am i supposed to use less?! i feel like i use less.. i make a pretty reasonable ration.. and it sucks not having conditioner.. shampoo is not the same without conditioner! and DO NOT even get me STARTED about 2 in 1.. ugggghhhh!! one day however, i noticed this.. the conditioner bottles are always less of an amount than the shampoo.. DAMN YOU SNEAKY BASTARDS.. except for pantene pro-v, which actually has more conditioner in their bottles than shampoo.. but i still ran out of the shampoo first.. ramble ramble izz what i doooo..

B'S MOM: so you weren't at work today, did you get a doctor's note?
B: yeahhhhhh..
B'S MOM: well.. where is it?
B: it's in my car.
B'S MOM: you didn't go!
B: yeahhhh.....i didn't (dammit).

your weakest moments are your strongest emotions.. some times you gotta drop kick life in the face, get up and say "fuck it, i'm fucking awesome". dude, you're fucking awesome, and it's almost the fucking weekend.. so let's drop kick the weekend in the fucking face. i love you bitch, and anyone that does, will treat you fucking awesome.. and to anyone that doesn't.. well.. we'll nickname them life.

SHE TALKS TOO MUCH AND HER VOICE IS ANNOYING..

but i won't shut up cuz thats just how i am!! what a PERFECT day to blog about things that are wack. can we get lost between god and a shot of scotch please?

"girls dig forbidden guys, i think that's why vampires are so popular right now."

ARE LILY AND CHUCK NOT THE CUTEST THING IN THE WORLD. what's with her though?! is she pregnant?! with serena's dad?! cuz if so that's laaame. i for one, am not pregnant, i'm just fat. hahaha. fuck. i is so loving chuck though. he's so perfect. swag for days, swag for mother fuckin days. bonibelle was able to ditch class today with me for some starbucks. snow makes me want starbucks. i think every time it snows, i just gotta have it. actually, a lot of things make me want starbucks.
so nas didn't graduate high school, and is planning to get his high school diploma which is pretty outrageous.

WHAT'S WACK WEDNESDAY

THIS MORNING because i woke up to snow..?! WTF?! there was no snow yesterday. and traffic was SLLLLLLLLOOOOWWW.. i got to my destination 25 mother fucking minutes late. thanks snow, you bitch azzzz.

CHUCK BASS' MOM you evil dirty little hoe! what is your deal!? are you really his mom?! did you pay someone to fake that dna test?! WHAT IS YOUR DEAL! i hate you!

JENNY you're another idiot. clearly damien was ugly first of all. & he's a drug dealer!! & not even a cool drug dealer! he's lame. you took a really long time to get in my good books jenny, stop fucking everything up!

KELIS you should've pickeed me nas, you should. have. picked. me.

GUCCI MANE i don't care what you say nike talk, he is lame.

YOU for thinking that you're better than me. fuck you.

LONG DIRTY HAIRED BITCHES who sit in front of me! and i have no other place to sit (at like the theatre or some shit).. and their hair hangs over the back of their chair, and it's frizzy/oily/dirty.. this is death scary.. "don't touch the hair botch.. don't touch the hair".. one time i almost sneezed on the bitch, wasn't even worried about spittin on her hair, i was more worried about bitch's hair swaying from my sneeze gust and touchin me.

BLACKBERRY DESKTOP SOFTWARE YOU PIECE OF SHIT. work when i tell you to work! dammit!

BLOG SHUT DOWN all these blogs that i once followed on blogspot are getting shut down. it's scaring me to shit. more than blogspot is getting shut down actually.. and if i ever get shut down, i lose all of this:( please don't shut me down blogger! i really need to get my own domain some day.

WET SOCKS you know.

NOT GETTING COMMENTS cuz you know. that shit sucks and what not.

what bugs you?!

LIFE TOO EASY!

"I CAN'T FUCKING STAND YOU ANYMORE. I FUCKING HATE YOU. I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO, I JUST WANT TO GO HOME!"

and repeat.. how do you like my song?

WHAT'S WACK WEDNESDAY

NICKI MINAJ - ughhhhhhhhh.. i don't care what you say i don't like her. i can't like her, i try to make myself like her and it just doesnt go down!! i like rappers who talk about real shit.. and she's just making cake off her being "cute".. which i GUESS i'll give her.. it disgusts me how everyone keeps asking me about her.. i don't like her!? really now.. really!? she's like three six mafia female version to me.. i just want jean grae to eat her up already.

SAND - stop destroying my shoes sand! i fucking hate you.. not blowing into my face would be cool too.

MONEY - for tearing people apart and not being in my wallet! having to work for you and for you only to disappear the next day. having no money was not in my life plan so step on into my life! please?

EX-GIRLFRIENDS PLAYING GAMES - i've had my break ups, i know how hard that shit is.. and honestly, crying in your room blasting music til your speakers bleed is kind of some what okay sometimes. do what you gotta do to deal with it, as long as you deal with it. flaunting around with another dude isn't classy, and neither is planning out cameos to wherever dude is going. it's border-line stalker. happy break up season.

BILLS - i'm pretty sure with the amounts of money i've paid telus, and with the amounts of money other people have paid telus.. they have the power to do more than offer me unlimited nights and weekends. they should have enough money to feed a small country by now. i'd rather give to the country.

You are having difficulties expressing yourself or getting your point across. You feel frustrated when your voice is not being heard. You may be experiencing feelings of inferiority and a lack of self-confidence in some situation or relationship in your life. This is an indication that you need to be more assertive and believe in the value of your own opinion. says life.

say what you mean and mean what you say! today is a good day.. now all i have to do is get my sleep back on track.. wish me luck?

HOLY. SHIT.

FUCK. IT'S FUCKING HOT!

HOOOOOOOLLLLYYYY FUUUCCCKKK. hose me down bitches, hose me down. i am sweating like a mother fucker. tomorrow it's going to be +33C, BUT.. with the humidity, it will be +40C. yes you read right. fucking forty degrees. crazy hot. crazy fucking hot. *dies. i totally have SO much shit to do, and blogging isn't on the list.. but i'm about to do it cause shit.. it's a nice way of avoiding what i actually have to do. if i don't get a load of laundry in tonight i am so gonna hate myself tomorrow. i decided to hit yall with another 25 of things that annoy me.. i'm about to start with only like four in my head right now, so we'll see how this goes.

25 (MORE) THINGS THAT ANNOY ME

1. SLOW JAM DRIVING
this goes out to the dudes that are blaring slow jams in their rides. yo azns. music is music, you like what you like.. BUT HONESTLY. SLOW JAMS..?! especially if you have a crazy system going on, your subs are blaring usher into my fucking area like you'se ill na na. NO BITCH NO, i do not think you're cute. i do not think you're sensitive.. or sexy. i think you're kinda really extraordinarily lame.

2. SANDOS
*shudder. hahaha. FUCKING SANDOS MAN! i only thought of sandos because of the slow jam thing. it was because of this dude, he was blasting some fucking 112 or something homo like that, and he comes out in his beater, we make eye contact, and he puts his uber ultra homo shades down like he's the coolest dude on the block. please son. you're skinny, you have no muscles, that beater makes you look like you're anorexic, and your slow jams are interfering with my cudi.

3. YO KANYE WHATS THE WORD?!
yo kanye.. STOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP. what is a blog?! blog is short for the term "web log".. meaning, an online journal. a place where viewers if interested, can view the lifestyle and opinions of a person. i fucking hate people who take things off of kanye's blog. and that's almost every blog in the world. i've been to kanye's blog i think twice in my entire life.. and i think the reason for this is because i don't need to go to kanye's blog, his blog is every other person's blog. let's just go ahead and say stealing things from other people's blogs is lame. it makes you look un-interesting, and it makes me think that you have nothing to say for yourself. i'm at your blog for one reason, to see what you think. not to see what kanye thinks. i could give a fuck what kanye thinks, i could give a fuck what drake thinks, i'll check their blogs if i want to.. for now keep the blogging to YOU.

4. DRAKE HOPPAHS!
drake's fucking cool, i like him. i think he's interesting, and he's a good listen.. but if i get asked "have you heard of drake?!" one more fucking time, you will feel my knuckles to your jaw son.

5. YOUR NOT SUPPOSED TOO TURN THEIR!
okay. i'm no grammatical genius. i have errors like crazy, and i know that too. mistakes happen, let's just try not to repeat them.. cause when i see the same thing over and over again.. my mind wants to bleed. "their", "your" = possession. "too" = also. "they're" = they are. "there" = location. if you need help, email me. i have a dude on my messaging list who has his name as "FINALE GOT A BLACKBERRIE!!" um dude. how the fuck are you gonna spell blackberry wrong?! it's written on your fucking phone!

6. HOLDSKIES.
i'd like to think that gestures shouldn't be selfish. but fuck it. i'm selfish. so it'd be nice to hold the door for someone, and get a fucking thank you. i am not the door man, i did not HAVE to hold the door for you, i'm not asking for a tip, or a nice dinner later, just a "thank you" would be appreciated.

7. GROCERY COURTESY
you're at safeway, grabbin your goods, and someone has their cart parked in the middle of the aisle, and they're taking their sweet ass time looking at whatever the fuck their looking at. "oooh if we buy two of these, we save forty cents.. but really i like the other one!!" UHM HELLO. and then when i say "excuse me" these cats look at me like i'm an asshole. i refuse to turn around and go all the way to the end of the aisle just so i can move from aisle one, to aisle two, to grab my fucking cereal. i'd like to just squeeze by please. please?

8. CHOMMMPPCHOMPPP
people who chew with their mouth open. i can not believe i forgot this one on my first list. THIS ANNOYS ME TO SHIT. you sound like a fucking cow! there's no rush here. this is how eating works, we'll use a two person date for an example. john and jane are on a date. john is talking, while john is talking, jane can be eating, and LISTENING. jane's turn. jane makes a response, while john takes a bite. it works full circle! the sound of food and spit whirling around while i'm trying to enlighten you with awesomeness doesn't sit well at our mcdonald's table okay son! close your mouth for a second.

9. NAIL-CLIPPING
the sound of nail-clipping just sounds gross to me. it just sounds gross. i don't know if this is just me, but i'd prefer if no one did this in front of me. behind bathroom doors!

10. SPEAKING OF BATHROOOOOMS
flush the toilet. this goes for everybody, i didn't know people shit on toilet seats at home.. cause that's what i see in public bathrooms. i didn't know it was that hard, to sit, do yo thing, and flush. i refuse to touch public toilet seats, they're nasty. especially after seeing tampons and shit smeared across toilet seats. yup, it aint pretty. so next time you think about being a fucking asshole in the bathroom, think about how it feels to see that when you really gotta take a piss. it hurts the heart, really it does.

11. MICROWAVES
no i love microwaves. i just hate waiting. oh 10 seconds left! and i count with my microwave, like that makes it go faster.. and i'll open it right at one second, thinking oh it's pretty much finished.. but i still gotta pop it back in for like another minute.. and i waisted like a minute by now, which could have been a minute of my food heating.. but nope. still frozen. i fail hahahha.

12. MOSQUITOES
you fucking assholes.

13. TATTOOS IN LANGUAGES THE OWNER DOESNT SPEAK
tattoos are art.. they are placed on your body, because you want that artwork, to be a part of you. i get that, that's cool. if you really fall into a culture, that's cool.. but if you're trying to look bad ass by getting a chinese tattoo, when you're not chinese, it looks lame, and screams typical.. and i don't even wanna ask you what it means cause i don't caaare.

14. THE WAR AGAINST MARIJUANA
weed makes up 90% of the illegal drug trade in the world.. in america, 25 million americans smoke weed regularly without causing harm to society. that is fact. marijuana has been proven to be less dangerous than tobacco, AND alcohol, and is STILL illegal. fuck the system.

15. YOU'RE TOO MUCH
i'm all for opinion. i'm mouthy as fuck, and i love word.. i stand up for what i believe in, and i voice what i think loud.. but i try to never put what i think on someone else. if you believe in homo-sexuality, cool. if you're a christian, cool. that's YOU. i don't care what other people believe in, as long as they don't force it on to others.. and don't say someone else is wrong for a BELIEF. no, they are not WRONG, they just believe in something DIFFERENT. (this is contradicting in the sense that someone can totally say, "well i BELIEVE you're WRONG in saying that what you BELIEVE in, is right!", ok shut up, i found the loop hole in this. suck my dick. you know whaat i meannn)

16. PRISSY NON-SMOKERS
LOOK. you already took away our smoking indoors, we put up with fucking smoking in blizzards to protect all your asses. so please don't give me the fucking eye if my smoke goes in your face while we're outside. i did not mean for my smoke to go near you. i am a person, and i smoke, there is wind, and not a lot i can do. if that bothers you, i suggest YOU move, cause we've already given up a lot to make your pansy ass happy.

17. "YOU'RE DISGUSTING."
this coincides with number 16. non-smokers who think that smoking is disgusting. FUCK YOU okay. you think you're better than me because you don't smoke?! no. this is the worst from ex-smokers and fat people. ex-smokers because they think because they quit smoking, they're some ill na na.. and i don't know why fat people tend to rag on me for smoking, but it's fucking frequent. maybe it's to make them feel better about being fat. "I HOPE YOU DONT GET CANCER!!", uhhh.. why dont you run on a treadmill you fat fuck!? oh wait! smokers are thinner than non-smokers who have the same calorie intake, i get it.. you jealous! lol. our blood pressure is also lower! suck on that! every time someone says something about smoking, i really want to punch them in the face. i am quite aware of my habit thanks, i don't need your "holier than thou" attitude to accompany me, i'm a smoker, i'm cooler than you.

18. HONKING IN A TRAFFIC JAM
i can understand honking when someone doesn't notice the light is green. that's what a horn is for, to get attention.. but when you're not going anywhere, and you're honking.. it's not doing anything bud. it's really not. it's just making everyone else feel lousy and irritated. your horn will not make the cars magically disappear. nope. you're stuck. so chill son. throw on some radio and breathe. turn your wipers on and off if you really need to touch something.

19. CARDBOARD TAMPONS
i don't know why these are still being made.. but they are basically a torture device.

20. BUS-WAITING
when you're waiting for a bus and someone asks, "did the bus come yet?!" um. WHY THE FUCK WOULD I STILL BE STANDING THERE?! yes it did. i just come here to watch all the pretty buses go by. oh look, there goes another! so pretty.

21. NO INTROS
when you're with somebody, and they see their friend, and they start talking to them without introducing you. oh. okay. yeah. it's cool. i'll just chill here. you guys need anything or?! .. no no! don't let me interrupt, i'll just go chill by that lamp post, and yall can holler if you need me.

22. THE REALLY LOUD SONG ON YOUR IPOD
i don't own an ipod, i use my berry.. and i don't know why but i'll be chillin listening to some good hip hop then all of a sudden my head explodes cuz one single song is ten billion volume notches higher than all my other songs.. :(

23. GROUPS IN ENTRANCES
*sigh. i wanna get by! cant your conversation between forty billion people be moved just a tad to the side?! this is the WORST at the movie theater. for some reason, people always wanna stand and talk about shit in front of the fucking bathroom. I NEED TO FUCKING PEE BITCHES! can i also add in people who ask me "what's going on!?" during a movie. i'm watching the same movie as you kid, i know the same info as you. maybe it's time you go to the bathroom.

24. "OVERKILL"
when girls dress up in bar clothes to go somewhere where bar attire is not needed. bling and booty shorts to the fucking mall?! forreal dude?! a dress and fake tan for a hip hop show!? go home and change

25. THAT IM ONLY ON NUMBER 16..
and i still got 9 more to go before my 25 series is complete.. oh boy.



side rant: i aim to be the best person i can possibly be. please don't drag me down.

side rant part two:

that's the "new" dora the explorer.. WHYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!