I JUST WANT TO LET IT GO..

that'll be the best therapy for me..


i just came to get lost between god and a shot of scotch?THESE PAST FEW DAYS HAVE BEEN SO FUCKED UP.

i'm usually not one to complain, i mean, it might seem to many that i'm a pussy and can't deal with shit.. but you try a day in my shoes, 5 bills says you wouldn't be able to take it. i'm pretty good at brushing shit off, shoving it into a jar, closing that shit tight and moving on like everything's fucking peachy. which probably isn't the best way to go about things, but it's my way. so that's what i plan to do.. although i must admit, my box of jars is getting kind of full.. luckily i have the greatest friends to help me carry the load. bonibelle, bianca, my boys, my sister, my brother. they're all pretty fucking legit. so with them, limitations can't be set. no matter what happens EVER, i'll end up being okay.. with that said, i had lunch with some righteous people, plane tickets booked, my internet's running smoothly and i'm in a good mood.. so let's get to bloggin.

25 THINGS I JUST GOTTA DO

..before i die.

i wrote a list about five years ago, it's up to about 185 if i can remember correctly.. of things that i would like to do/accomplish before my time is up.. i get about one crossed off every.. 4 months, which is pretty pathetic.. but once october hits, i plan to go pretty hard at getting it done.. and once i hit the age of 25, i plan to spend that entire year working on that list. i can't find the list at the moment, so i'm going to do what i can from memory. here goes it.

1. GET SOMETHING PUBLISHED
it doesn't have to be a book. i really want to write a book, but i only have one i really WANT to write. i'd rather have an article or an interview published. do any publishers read my blog!? PUBLISH ME SON!

2. GET A TATTOO
roger! let's get our first tattoos together! i know what tattoo i've wanted since i was 15.. which makes me think it's a proper tattoo to get. i just haven't manned up enough to actually do it. i don't have the fucking balls either.. and i don't want to get it where i live.. meaning, i want to get it while i'm on vacation or something. i want it to be spontaneous, but at the same time i want it to look good. cheers to hoping that happens.

3. MEET NAS
yeah. nas is my hero. i say this pretty much every day and sometimes people are like, "well what if nas thinks you're a douche?!" well then.. that.. would really blow hahaha. i don't really know guys, if nas thinks i'm a douche, then that'll really suck.. cuz i done been waiting for like how many years to meet dude. i have a feeling when i meet him i'm gonna mumble and mess up my words but try and play it cool and it'll be a big mess anyway.. which i totally don't mind. meeting him, even if it's embarrassing, will still make me happy. he's my fucking idol!

4. MAKE OUT IN THE RAIN
not planned though. just happens.

5. SWIM WITH DOLPHINS
cuz i wanna touch a dolphin so badly! they just look so soft and righteous don't they?!

6. GO TO PARIS
.. i HAVE to. i just have to.

7. DONATE BLOOD
i've tried to donate blood, but i was never able to because my iron is always too low. so one day, when my iron is top notch, i want to get into that hospital and just be like, stab me bitches im donatin!! i'm just in it for the free cookies and juice afterward.. just kidding. i really want to do this, and hope i get the chance to!

8. SHOOT A GUN
aggie?! what happened to our shooting range date!?

9. SKY-DIVE
my dad did this all the time, and he took my sister a few times, so i feel like i just have to. i don't wanna do it til i'm like 25 though.. if i can, i'd like to go with my sister. i think that'd be so ill.. but she'd have one up on me cause she's done it before.. maybe not then. ahhahaha. she's just professional lol..

10. BUY A PLANE TICKET
.. by buy a plane ticket i mean, go to the airport and say "what international flight leaves next?!" and buying that ticket. no matter where it is.

11. SEND A MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE
i plan to do this in october. the message will say "5YN-tifik dot blogspot dot com".. holla son.

12. BE THE BOSS
so i checked my lottery tickets, and i won! but only $2.. so i guess my sneaker boutique is put on hold til the next lottery pot.. which is cool cuz i don't want 30 million, i want 50.

13. STAND BEHIND A WATERFALL
and then make-out behind it.. if permitted. showering in a waterfall would be pretty cool too.. but i guess it would have to be like.. a really soft hitting waterfall. a small one.. still game.

14. TEACH SOMEONE ILLITERATE TO READ
because i think i can do it.. and i think i would be able to do it without making the person feel like an idiot. i think everyone in the world deserves the gift of reading, and to give someone that option would be such a good feeling.. for the both of us.

15. RUN A MARATHON
i've already ran a marathon, but i was 17. so that was four years ago.. i'd like to run a marathon again.. and i know bianca's game so?

16. GO TO A BLUES BAR IN CHICAGO
because chicago is home to the blues.

17. SURF
i've been boogie boarding, and jet-skiing, and tubing.. but i haven't been surfing. i'm pretty scared of surfing because surfers get attacked by sharks (they think the surfboards are seals) so this would really be a triumphy moment for me.. ay richard! wutanG.

18. ATTEND THE SUPER BOWL
then dag.

19. HOST SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE
uhm. shut up! i can totally do it. possibilities are endless! you wait and see bitches.. you wait and see..

20. GIVE $100 TO A BUSKER
as soon as i win the lottery, this is one of the first things i will do. i have a soft spot for buskers. they don't beg, they're workin for their shit.. on their fuckin' hustle.. i've gone through some pretty hard days, then i hear like a crazy radiohead/green day cover, and my day is good again. i'd like to give them that good day feeling one day.

21. MEET LUPE FIASCO
the chance is coming close people! it's coming close..!

22. HAVE A GRAND WEDDING
a huuuuge wedding. with doves!! "YOU KNOW WHY?! CUZ I CAN AFFORD IT!" - mikey. so down..

23. STAR-GAZE WITH SOMEONE ILL NA NA
i did this with my ex-boyfriend, but it was kind of short-lived.. like we only watched stars for like fifteen minutes before we decided to go back to the party and get drunker hahahah.. plus toronto's downtown lights kind of take away from actual star-gazing. i wanna stare at the stars for a good hour, at least.. i guess camping kind of counts but i was too head bust to like remember it. hahaha.

24. LIVE IN AN ANOTHER COUNTRY FOR AT LEAST A YEAR
at LEAST. new york counts. big up to new york.

25. BECOME PERFECTLY FLUENT IN AN ANOTHER LANGUAGE
because my french, tagalog and spanish are fucking mediocre. i want french first.. so i can go to paris..!

i had another 25 before this, and my internet shut down and i pretty much lost it. it fucking blows. so i'm going to have to re-write that again.. my internet is fucking corrupt to shit, just like my life! ay! hahahah.
in other news.. BIANCA IS HEREEEE!! yayayyayayyyy!! lezz parttyy like it's 1999 on a budget! holla. VIP on a budget.

weekend was crazy. pure crazy. can't even talk about it, cuz it was too crazy.. and they're only bound to get crazier. so waddup world, come fucking party with me bitches!! i'll see you at alive!
i also finally got my passport in.. so if anyone wants to go to chicago this weekend?! just throwin it out there..
HI ALI.. i just wanna say i wanna play with your son.. ! i didn't get a chance to at the beach cuz i was so hungovverrr and gross feeling. that is all..!

SNEAK PEEK !