I DIDN'T WATCH THE VMA'S.

I don't have cable. I watched the N'Sync performance though.. as well as the Miley(?) Cyrus(?) Robin(?) Thick(?) performance(?).

That many question marks were included because I have that many questions. What the fuck was that?! I was un-aware that a band-aid could stick their tongue out that much.



Miley was like they took a drunk girl out of the audience and said "hey, go ahead". If it was a drunk girl, everyone would be all roar, but because this was a celebrity who has had some formal celebrity training, everyone sat there stone faced questioning their religions and if buying an outfit for the vma's was really a contender against pajamas and some ice cream.
Miley was like when you have the flu on your birthday.
Miley was like trying on the last pair of amazing shoes on at a store, and they're your size but for some reason a weird fit and don't fit you right.
Miley was like an old lady's thong showing.
Miley was like vomit from a night of excessive drinking, that you found in the morning because you forgot to flush it.
Miley was like getting an invitation to a wedding when you hate the couple getting married.
Miley was that neighbor that follows your "Okay nice talking to you.." with "Just one more thing...." and continues for a half hour.
Miley was like getting pants'd by a stranger and you were wearing your mom's underwear.
Miley was like gluing your toes together then stepping on shards of glass and falling into a pit of fire, only surviving an extra five minutes to watch that VMA performance.

Isn't like Robin Thicke, way older?! Most awkward performance of all time. Me super confuse. Someone tell this girl she most certainly CAN stop, and should.

Thanksies!