LIFT ME UP ON TOP OF YOU, AND CALL ME YOUR GIRL..

 

See I was swiping through me memories to see you, boy 

When we're apart you know I miss that energy 

 And that’s something they just can’t deny 

 No matter how many hours have passed 

 How many miles apart , nothin' else ever lasts 

 'Cause no one can make you feel like this 

 See you could wash any man right out of my hair 

I could make you wish to god that she was never there  

So lift me up on top of you and call me your girl 

We're hitting 4th gear, I’m on top of the world

IT'S A WALK IN THE PARK, IT GOES..

Despite things being a little heavy and my head being a little crazy, I have been carrying myself very well. This month's playlist was one that I really, really felt. I felt the beats, I felt the lyrics, I felt the emotion and the stories. A lot of them are chillwave or indie, but you'll still find a few classic bops. I did A LOT of listening to music this month as I was in situations that allowed me to do so. Two people asked me to create them playlists this month, so I listened to some of my old favorites and researched blogs and new artists and also compiled them into mine. Some of these songs are absolute favorites but I knew nothing about the artist(s) behind the music, so I took time to do that. Some days I felt sad, some days I felt ok, some days I felt sexy, some days I felt anxious, some days I just felt. I am so many things. A disco queen. A hip hop head. A punk rocker. A sad girl. An indie lover. An electro bunny. I really have a vast taste in music because I am committed to good music, period. The genre has never mattered. My personality is all over the map, why would my music taste be any different?! Anyway, this playlist is really, really, me. I hope it finds you well.

Xx,

Botch

MAKES IT HARD TO BREATHE, WORDS COME OVER ME.

If ever you've wondered what it's like for me to simply *EXIST*.

This song is a bop and rings very true!

I THINK I'LL LOVE YOU FOREVER.

Xx

YOU SAVE ME.

There'd be no song without you.

I JUST WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU.

 

Yeah that's the drive, as I remember. And that's the one, the one I wanted, yeah. Pull me close, don't ask me nicely. Don't be polite, I want it all. I just want to hear from you. Ask me questions. Oh, I just want to hear from you. Out of context.

You won't forget it, so don't even try. We drank too much, we killed our nerves though I - let myself fall just to feel you catch me. I know that's not fair.

DEAR GODDESS, GIVE ME PATIENCE

 

WELCOME TO THE SAD FEMME CLUB, baby, you are enough.

Tired of trying to explain
I've got zero tolerance
When they fuck with my sacred space
Bar the trolls, hit the corners for escape
Build the platforms, take up space
Code the scripts to infiltrate
'Cause you're never not fighting
A racist system that keeps powers in place
And that fails to acknowledge the root of your pain
Took it too personal, over-emotional
Where are you from? Are you beauty or brains?
Over the top, I'm too little or too much
Damned if I do and I'm damned if I do not

EVERY STAR I SEE, I THINK OF YOU.

Artist: Maria Uve 

Wake Up.
a poem by Botch

Wake up. Softly. Reach across the sheets.

Somewhere between the moon and where the stars meet.

I open my eyes, I reach. Empty hands. Empty me.
Empty. Longing. Wishing. One more dream.

Woken. Too loud, this single heartbeat.

You're there, somewhere between the moon and where the stars meet.

The next room. The next bed. The next, next.

Early morning rises, no goodnight text.

Somewhere between the moon and where galaxies are tucked.

Goodnight, goodnight, and always good luck.

Xoxo, 

B

"WILL YOU LET ME KNOW WHEN YOU POST YOUR FIRST ONE?"

 A 9 year old asked me if I had a TikTok over the weekend. I immediately responded with, "Why did you ask me that?"

Her response? "You look like a famous TikToker. Your hair and lipstick are pretty".

This was followed by a couple telling me they spoke about me for hours after a poetry reading one night, that my words resonated and sat with them when they laid in bed before rest. Alright well the sadness ye ol' Botchy feels went poof, dissipate.

If you've ever thought complimentary about someone, tell them. Tell them! Took my super sad month into a new direction and had me actually feeling like, "Maybe I can do this."

Someone remind me to let the little girl know when I make my first TikTok.

I've been livin' bummy

Wake up, shake these hips and strut
Catch me actin' dummy
I've been feelin' anxious
I've been feelin' sunny
I've been up and down as fuck
Tell me, do you love me?
Say it to me like you mean it
Top down, sinking with my thoughts down

This song SLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. SOOOOOOOOO HARD. When the "I got 20 bands.." hits, brace yourselves. This is the kind of rap you shake the car with because you and your friends are seat dancing too hard. Issa bop.

Enjoy, bye.

Xx

BOYLIFE : INSTAGRAM ||| TWITTER

Won't you come around to my place?

Slow down, won't you come around?
Slow down, won't you come around to my ways?

THERE WAS NOTHING MUCH TO SAY..

Every word I read, I think of you. Every song I hear, I think of you. Every love I have, I think of you.

EXES AND O'S

I keep having these weird dreams of past lovers with new girls. Oh, these new girls. They're pretty. They're skinny. They have time for nail polish and haircuts. They make time to cook meals and do outdoor activities. They have a sense of humor. They laugh when you whisper the funny thing in their ear, and their laugh echoes so sweetly. They sleep like an angel, they don't snore. They wear skirts and dresses that sway in the wind, gently and modestly. Their makeup is perfect and their eyeliner is sharp, but they don't even need makeup. They're a winner with parents and the waiter pays extra attention to them. They have a sparkle in their eye and not a blemish covers their skin, nor a scar, or a mark.

.. and then I notice.. so faintly.. a familiar sound, it gets louder, and louder and the familiarity intensifies with the increasing of every notch in volume..

..you're playing them songs I showed you.

And that, is my greatest fear, and my biggest delight. I will always, have that.

Hello nightmare. Sleep well.

BUT.. BUT.. I NEED YOU..

This month's playlist was based around long drives and old blog entries. Went through a few waves this month. I didn't focus too hard on discovering music, but more so, I let music discover me. This time around, I wasn't obsessing too much trying to discover bops on music blogs (which is what I was forcing myself to do as I made the transition of getting back into music). I didn't check listings or album reviews. I caught a song playing on a speaker outside, so I shazammed it. I let people play me their favorite tracks, and added the ones I liked. I went into a deep, deep, deep dive of some old Livejournal entries and listened to the ones that tugged on my heart strings in the past. Caught a few from Ubers, and Snapchats from friends. Music can come at you from any way and all ways, and this month, it totally did. This one felt very chill for me, I put a lot of time into writing this month and with that, I needed music that wasn't too heavy, but I also needed music that spoke to me. Minimal party/dancey chunes, a little more of the in your feels. Hope you find something you like.



Xo,

Botch

How is it gonna feel?

Things are gonna feel different
Days are gonna slow down
It's amazing how these things make us
Just rollin' around in our minds
Waiting for you
I'm waiting for you

Kind of a Smiths vibe to this one, it is just so beautiful. I can't, it's too pretty. I've listened to it a bunch of times as it's in my August playlist, and every time it comes on, it hits me right in the gut.. and when I first heard it.. YOU GUESSED IT, I cried. We all have an Amelia, don't we? This track carries me to that moment you urge for that one special person to not let go, and even if they do, we'll be waiting.

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