Tuesday, March 22, 2011


So today I went to Winners with E, and she spent about $250 in there. I spent zero, just wasn't feeling the shwag today. Upon leaving, "security" comes up to me and says, "I'm sorry, but can you give us back the merchandise you stole?" and I'm like.. "What?!". "The socks that you're hiding in your jacket". Socks? In my jacket?! So immediately I say, "This, this? This right here, is my wallet, I didn't bring a bag". Then they say, "No. The socks you stole".
Getting angry at this point because 1, I have NEVER shop-lifted in my entire life, and 2, you can clearly see how much money we spent, we don't need to steal no fucking socks. SO THEN, one of the guy says to me, "We have the tag you ripped off and we have you on camera, it's what the video shows. So, to make this easier, just give us the merchandise and there won't be any trouble". So I take off my jacket, take off my sweater, in the middle of a fucking parking lot and I say how I clearly don't have them, and that they're fucking psycho, and they keep showing me this tag that I have never seen before trying to prove to me that I stole.. So THEN they say "Listen, we don't want to have trouble here, you need to stop causing a scene, otherwise we'll have to get further authorities involved". So I say something like, "I have $500 in cash in my wallet right now, my sister's a fucking cop, so if you want to go ahead and call the fucking cops, I can go ahead and do that for you. I don't know why the fuck you keep showing me this fucking tag like it's going to make me confess I stole something, if you want me to take off more clothes we can go ahead and do that in the parking lot". Then the first guy who was saying nothing but kept showing me this stupid tag was all, "Okay, sorry for the mistake bye".
Listen here you bunch of fucking fucks. A $5 pair of socks is nothing, and EVEN THOUGH IT'S NOTHING, I surely think you would be absolutely positive before you accuse someone of stealing. I vouche to NEVER feed you business AGAIN, which is a shame for you because I was a frequent customer. I spent $100 at another winners before hand. AND, if you wanna fucking come and ask me to calm down after I'm mad at YOU for being WRONG, you can go ahead and suck some dick. You gonna try and make me look like a fucking hoodrat in the middle of a parking lot?! Fuck you. I have more money in my bank account than the both of you combined I'm sure. & to accuse me with nervousness in the voice and say you're gonna call the cops on me, shows me that you're a fucking pussy who isn't sure what the fuck you're talking about. Get your facts straight before addressing an innocent person. Shop again? Never. You fuckin' pricks.


Anonymous said...

What a fucking douchebags!


syntifik said...

I know :(

Maribeth said...

find out who their boss is get them fired

I Was Here said...

They just wanted to see your good good's Botch! Ha. I try to find the humor in everything or else I would lose my fucking mind. True story :p

Ron said...


Wish I had 5 bennys in my wallet.. :-/

Ffehj said...

wow what if they called your bluff?! "Yeah my sister said the cops are unavailable right now...secret mission..."

syntifik said...

maribeth: wrote a letter to corporate.. but have to send it.

perla: thanks perla you weirdo! hahah

ron: only because i was paying my bills right after.. ! but still!

jheff: i wasn't bluffing, i really did call my sister. i wanted the cops to come to tell you the truth.